Text Etiquette

1206This is me not wanting to go to bed on a holiday at midnight.

Once again, I am not an expert on dating; I just want to share my opinion.

More often than not, my conversations drift to relationships. It doesn’t matter who I’m with, I always end up on that subject. So while I’m there, why don’t you join me? How about we talk about text etiquette. Now there’s not sure manuel on how to text, but I can try.

Here is a quote from Ruthie Dean‘s website;

“Be a man. Get in the Word. Stop texting. Pursue a woman!”

I can see where texting to ask on a date can be problematic. In today’s time, texting is a common thing. I did read an interesting article the other day on how chivalry is dead and that people don’t want commitment. Sadly, that’s what it feels like. I for one want commitments. Why do you think I’m dating? For fun? (Well…yes, but in the long run I want to settle down with a lovely wife, but that’s for another post.)

Ruthie continues, on another post, to say

Don’t Text Back. Text messages and any form of social media communication should never be the way you get asked out. If a guy can’t pick up the phone and CALL you to ask you to dinner, then he’s just not that into you. The first few months of dating—guys are on the their best behavior and if text messages are the ‘best’ wooing efforts they can put forward, then they aren’t going to do ANY BETTER down the road.  PLEASE don’t make excuses for him. You deserve better.”

Now she’s talking to the ladies, but we men can learn a thing or two, right? First, I’d like to argue Ruthie’s point. Yes, calling is better, but texting is an easy way for us men to not be hurt when turned down for a date. At least on my side of things, I don’t like to hear a “no.” Sometimes it feels like women aren’t helping us out in the dating world. It seems like they might even be making it harder for us. Frankly, I like straight answers as to wither or not she’d like a second date, even on the first one. Moving on.

Don’t overshare. Your I’ve never told anyone this before stories should not come until engagement is discussed. You can gradually share more intimate, personal details after you’re in a committed relationship but not before then!”

Okay, I can agree to this one. Getting to know people takes time. Think about this; how would you like to know (on the first date) that your date has qualities/interests/tendencies/etc that without knowing here, would cause you to turn away? (That sounds weird in writing.) What I’m trying to say is that there is some information that you need to tell once you’ve had the chance to talk and to know your date better. (Sorry if my thoughts aren’t making sense. It’s late and at least I’m understanding my thoughts…)

Here’s another point. When you’re asking someone out on a date, make sure you use the word “date.” Don’t do the following:

“If you ever wanted to come over for dinner sometime, let me know.” (link)

That same article talks about how men who text to ask on a date, aren’t confident. I can see that. Less rejection, right? I am guilty of using text to ask girls on dates. I had a bunch of blind dates this month, so we corresponded via text. I think that that’s alright, since I don’t actually know the person. Or maybe it’s not ok? Anyway…don’t be passive when asking a girl out. Just ask her out.

I suppose I should get back on topic…when texting a girl, please don’t send one-word texts. I have heard from a female that that’s annoying and that it’s hard to make a conversation from “Hi.” How can you solve that? Add more to that one text. You can say “Hi. How are you?” Violá! You just started a conversation with someone. Do your best to avoid one-word texts. You also don’t need to use all 160 characters. Long texts are for those moments when email isn’t available and when calling the person won’t work because the other person is busy. (Although receiving a long text would make me want to read it even more when I’m busy…) I suppose that if you’re going to use all 160 characters, just call her.

 

Very well. That’s all that I will post tonight/this morning. Stay tuned! My next post will be about how we men can ask women out! (Source)

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